MRA edited ‘The Last Jedi’ to contain no women; internet laughs

In what sounds to be an article by the Onion, a member of the Men’s Rights Activists (MRA) edited Star Wars: The Last Jedi and removed almost all of the women from the film.

The misogynist edit, which is only 46 minutes out of the 2 hours and 32-minute film, is titled “The Last Jedi: De-Fminized Fanedit” and was anonymously uploaded to The Pirate Bay website on Monday.

The uploader included a list of everything that was taken out:

– No whiny/reluctant/murderous psycho Luke.

– NO HALDO! She simply doesn’t exist. Her whole subplot doesn’t exist. The Kamikaze is carried out by Poe. ( = Poe dies.)

– Leia never scolds, questions nor demotes Poe.

– Lea dies. Kylo kills her.

– Kylo is more badass and much less conflicted and volatile.

– Kylo takes on more of Snoke’s guards, Rey struggles with a single one.

– No bomber heroism by china girl in the beginning.

– No Canto Bight.

– No superpowered Rey.

– Luke is not a semi-force-ghost and is smashed by the first laser cannon shot. (sorry, I just had to!)

– Phasma is finished after the first blow by Finn. (Women are naturally weaker than men, she isn’t force-sensitive, and we know nothing about any exo-skeleton in her suit)

– Asian chick speaks less, doesn’t bully Finn, Finn doesn’t try to escape, she is never formally introduced. She is just there and occasionally smiles at Finn or screams “Finn!”. She has no sister. Serves her right for all the heinous stuff she did.

– Lots of little cuts reducing the number of female facial shots. Too many to count. (Pun intended.)

– Quite a few scenes rearranged so that the flow of the shortened movie is still somewhat coherent.

Of course, when you think about it. The whole story without the women would make absolutely no sense and would be really awkward especially Kylo Ren’s shirtless scene. The uploader even notes, “there are plotholes and continuity errors and some cuts are not as smooth as they should be, especially audio transition-wise.”

The internet was not forgiving regarding this new upload. Instead of getting angry, the internet just laughed, including director Rian Johnson, Mark Hamill, and John Boyega.

Nice try, MRA.

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