Top 5 nitpicks about Game of Thrones season 7

Game of Thrones season 7
It’s hardly controversial to call Game of Thrones season 7 a bit uneven. Although there were some remarkable highs (the Queen of Thorns’ final scene and the stunning, if poorly named, Loot Train Battle come to mind), there were also some pretty perplexing lows. From the sudden emergence of supersonic ravens to puzzling decisions from many of our favorite characters solely to service plot development, the latest season will likely go down as a somewhat middling season in what will likely end up being among the most critically acclaimed and adored shows of all time.

Perhaps it was the shortened season or the fact that the showrunners had to get through a lot of plot in a very brief amount of time. But there were definitely moments that strained viewers credulity on a show that features fire breathing dragons and smoke monsters that come out of women’s…um, lady parts. Yet in spite of the mix of epic and awful episodes, Game of Thrones continues to serve as the standard bearer for event television. The only program on television that can bring an entire country together to discuss topics as varied as succession planning among royalty and casual incest.

And seeing as how we have potentially up to 18 months to wait until the next season of Thrones, it’s time to nitpick some things that really bothered me about Game of Thrones Season 7. To be clear, I really enjoyed this season. A friggin zombie dragon took down a thousand-year-old wall of ice! But, now that this season is over, I figure there’s never been a better time to gripe about my favorite show on television. Because we only nitpick the ones we love.

1. What was Tyrion thinking when he devised a plan to send Jon and company north of the wall to capture a white walker?

Tyrion had already made a huge strategic error this year when he sent troops to capture the strategically unimportant Casterly Rock, thus allowing Jamie to take Highgarden and its rich gold mines. But his plan to send men north of the wall to capture a white walker was absolutely ridiculous when you consider their overall plan. Tyrion knows Cersei better than anyone. He is intimately aware of her ruthlessness and cunning and knows that she would absolutely sacrifice everything and everyone to remain in power. Why would he suddenly think that showing her a white walker would make her just hang back, and let Daenerys and Jon consolidate their forces unchecked?

But even if we all agree that Dany shouldn’t fight a two front war, why not go after King’s Landing first? To the south, you have a human enemy that is besieged in a single castle that just suffered a huge defeat against dragons that are effectively invincible to normal weapons. And on the other, you have a massive wave of undead zombies that have no fear and can only be killed by a specific weapon. Wouldn’t it make sense to take out the easy threat first, and then deal with the white walkers, rather than trying to form a truce with a ruler who has been known to be untrustworthy, and just hope that, “Maybe this time it’ll be different.” Tyrion, you are excellent with wordplay, wine, and women, but maybe leave the soldiering to the others.

2. How did Cersei and Euron plot his sudden departure from their parlay with Dany when Cersei didn’t even know that the wight was in the box?

This oversight drove me crazy. Cersei and company see the wight in the box that Jon brought back from the north. And Euron immediately peaces out, saying, “I’m not scared of anything, but those zombie dudes are terrifying.” But then we later learn that Cersei planned to send Euron and his ships away so that he could bring back the Golden Company from Essos. But Cersei didn’t know that there was a wight in the box before the two sides met. She had no reason to assume that a white walker was going to be released from a box. In fact, she didn’t really know what Daenerys was going to propose to her at all. So how exactly did that “brilliant” plan get hatched? Did Cersei go to Euron and say, “At some point, make an excuse to pretend like you’re leaving and taking your fleet with you. You know, so they’ll think I’m weakened.” Uh yeah, sorry, that doesn’t quite hold up.

3. Why didn’t the Night King spear the dragon on the ground in front of him?

So you have a stationary dragon on the ground with your enemy riding atop it, and a dragon that’s flying through the air, whipping back and forth while firing jets of dragonfire from its mouth. Which target would you go for? So unless the Night King was getting bonus XP for hitting a skill shot, it made zero sense for him to chuck his ice lance at the fast moving Viserion, rather than the grounded Drogon. But, no, he decides to Yolo throw his lance and somehow perfectly pierces poor Viserion, sending him crashing into the icy water. But I have to admit, that shot of Viserion waking up as an ice dragon was pretty baller.

4. Why did Tyrion look so angry/pained when he saw Jon and Dany, ahem, combining ice and fire?

Tyrion has been among Danerys’ staunchest allies, and he has always had an affection towards his fellow outcast son, Jon. So it was quite odd to see his reaction to Jon giving Dany his Valerian steel. His look was a mixture of anger, unease, and maybe a bit of jealousy, that felt very much out of character with what we had seen from Tyrion thus far. Tyrion surely admires Dany, and maybe even has a sort of unrequited crush on her. But ultimately, he knows that Jon and Dany together makes sense. In fact, it might solve the whole succession issue entirely. So why does he look like he just caught his lover in bed with someone else?

5. Why are we all not more grossed out that an aunt and nephew are having sex?

I mean, #Jonerys forever! But, seriously… ewww!!!

And that’s my nitpicks for Game of Thrones season 7. Did you have any nitpicks? If so, let us know in the comments below.

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Brian Chu
Brian Chu 221 posts

Brian Chu is a Staff Writer for Nerd Reactor and aspiring Jeopardy contestant. He thinks Picard is the best captain, Cumberbatch is the best Holmes, Bale is the best Batman, and Tennant is the best Doctor. Follow him @chumeister