Yoga Hosers Review

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Kevin Smith is developing his own trilogy called the “True North Trilogy,” and much like Edgar Wright’s “Cornetto Trilogy,” each film is a different genre. The trilogy began with the 2013 horror film, Tusk, and continues again with the comedy, Yoga Hosers. A slight spin-off of TuskYoga Hosers sees the return of the Colleens, Harley Quinn Smith and Lily-Rose Depp. However, is Yoga Hosers as bad as Tusk or does Kevin Smith improve with the second film in his “True North Trilogy?”

Unfortunately, fans who has loved Kevin Smith for Clerks, Mallrats and Dogma will have to wait even longer for Smith’s return to form. His latest film, Yoga Hosers, is not only a bizarre film but it’s also an unfunny mess.

Yoga Hosers follows teenage girls, Colleen McKenzie (Harley Quinn Smith) and Colleen Collette (Lily-Rose Depp), as they’re trying to get through their boring lives in Canada. When their plans to go party with upperclassmen goes haywire, the Colleens soon discover an ancient evil in their town and it is up to them and legendary man-hunter, Guy LaPointe (Johnny Depp), to take down this threat once and for all.

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Kevin Smith is typically a great writer (see: the 3 aforementioned films) but Yoga Hosers is an unfocused mess. The film goes to multiple dead ends before the film goes through something resembling conflict. From this point on, the plot goes from dead end to predictable territory. The film doesn’t seem to veer much from its straight-forward path. The film also relies a lot on Canadian and millennial stereotypes for its laughs. Yes, they’re funny the first couple of times but it does get old.

Yet there’s something weirdly fascinating about having Kevin Smith’s daughter (Harley Quinn Smith) and Johnny Depp’s daughter (Lily-Rose Depp) doing a variation of Smith’s classic Dante and Randal character. On one hand, the gags fit like a glove in this day and age of social media. It’s a sound satire on millennials’ connectivity to their phones. On the other hand, there was some depth to Dante and Randal that is clearly missing from the Colleens. There isn’t much going on with these characters other than to save the world from the Bratzis. They’re just “so basic.”

With all the problems that the script has, the film does capture the essence of those midnight B-movie films that Smith clearly loves so much. Unlike his previous two films, Smith indulges himself in the idiotic genre silliness of this film. This indulgence results in a very weird film with a lot of randomnesses. However, if you can get past the weirdness of foot-tall Nazi sausages with Kevin Smith’s face on it killing people through their rectum then you can handle the weirdness of the film.

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There are a lot of problems in the film, but there are few bright spots in the cast. Justin Long is super funny as the Colleens’ overzealous and pretentious yoga teacher, Yogi Bayer. The ridiculousness of Yogi’s yoga moves brings most of the laughs to the film. Justin Long is seemingly up to do anything and the film is funnier for it. Ralph Garman’s cameo also is worth noting as well. His various celebrity and German impersonations will bring a few smiles to the table.

Unfortunately, the rest of the cast aren’t as good Garman and Long’s much smaller roles. As much as it seemed like a good idea to direct your daughter and your daughter’s best friend, it doesn’t quite work here. Harley Quinn Smith and Lily-Rose Depp clearly show their inexperience in their first major film role. Their dull screen presence wasn’t able to carry this film, even in its short run time. Even though Johnny Depp is unrecognizable as Guy LaPointe, he’s still hit or miss here. At times, he’s funny with his dopiness but other times his delivery falls flat.

Overall, Yoga Hosers isn’t the type of film that has any deep meaning or a point, really. It’s essentially a podcast riff made into a live-action movie and the film struggles to fill its feature length run time with most of the cast serving little purpose to the film. The end result is a messy film with a few bright spots.

Rating: 2.5/5
NR 2_5 Atoms - C-

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Mark Pacis
Mark Pacis 1515 posts

Self-proclaimed "Human IMDb" and comic book geek. Biggest Iron Man fan you'll probably ever meet.