STEVEN SPIELBERG RESPONDS TO HIS HUNTING PHOTO!

Quack-Reactor

speilberg-1

Steven aka “The Extinctor” Spielberg

If you’ve been living under a rock and didn’t know, it’s been about a few days since a picture of Steven Spielberg was released of him posing next to a dead dinosaur. The photo itself has gone viral and has a lot of anti-hunting activists up-in-arms about it. They’ve gone as far as calling Steven Spielberg the “worst human being” on the planet, and I agree with them – he needs to be stopped. After this picture’s release (above), it looks like more and more photos of Spielberg’s hunting escapades are leaking out all over the net, and some of them are just heart wrenching.

We caught up with Mr. Spielberg recently to hear what he had to say for himself, and some of you aren’t going to like it:

spielberg-6

(chuckling) …you all need to calm down, ok. You all think I’m some sort of a monster? Is that it? Well I’m going to clear this all up right here and tell you that the real monsters are them; the unnatural creatures of this world that don’t belong in it anymore. Some people might not know this, but when we created the movie Jurassic Park, we actually did bring dinosaurs back to life at the studio. We had an over population of Triceratops, and since I love hunting, I had to put some of them down myself. It was a necessity since we only had one Tyrannosaurus Rex. She couldn’t compensate eating ALL the extras! I’m not talking about the background actors, mind you (winks). Listen, my family has a lineage of great hunters. (hands us a picture)

speilberg-2

TOP LEFT: Jebediah Spielberg. Steven’s uncle.

You see this? That’s my uncle Jebediah. He helped to take out that Pteronadon that was plaguing his town. Dinosaurs and all these other creatures are supposed to be extinct or aren’t supposed to exist, and I’m here to help keep it that way. The Jurassic Park series is supposed to teach you that humanity triumphs in the end, and that’s what I’m helping to accomplish, ok? Did I kill a Unicorn? Hell yeah, I did. They’re not supposed to exist. Did I kill a giant parrot in London? You’re damned right I did. Balance to the natural order needs to be restored. I’m coming for you next, Bigfoot! This interview is over (pushes microphone away).

This man is sick and I don’t even know how to contain my anger after he blatantly admitted to killing a unicorn. Do you know what a unicorn is? It’s one of the most majestic creatures ever to grace mythology, and Spielberg just shot it without giving it a second thought. Here are some of the latest pics of this disgusting human being exacting his “balance” on nature. I…I can’t write anymore. That dead unicorn has me in tears.

spielberg-5

🙁 Spielberg and the last known unicorn.

spielberg-3

Polly want a coffin? 🙁 What a tragic end to our cracker eating friend.

Source: The Unicorn Chronicles

Facebook Comments