Review: Strippers vs. Werewolves

So Halloween is around the corner, and there are going to a few new Horror movies coming out. I got a chance to see Strippers vs. Werewolves. That’s right!  We’ll see if Van Helsing will have anything to worry about.

The movie takes place in a local London strip club, “The Silvadollaz”. A stripper dressed in a school girl uniform named  Justice was giving a VIP dance for a client, but things got a little hairy and out of hand. Justice freaked out and stabbed her client in the bloody eye with a silver fountain pen. At this point in the movie I didn’t know if I could finish watching it, and I was only seven minutes in. It was that bad. It’s not even craptastic. It should have been called Horny Werewolves vs. Dumb Strippers. If you are going to hire someone to play the main stripper, make sure she knows how to dance exotically. The dance felt really awkward.

The director thought it was clever to add werewolves into the mix to help the storyline. Fail! When the first guy turned into a werewolf, my first thought was, “Were-rat.” I didn’t really see a wolf in that form at all. In the latter half of the movie, there’s a surprise cameo from Robert Englund (Freddy Krueger) and Alan Ford (Snatch). If only this was enough to save this movie. Sadly, it wasn’t.

There’s a scene where the strippers were using a high-pitched noise using the club speakers to hurt the werewolves ears. There’s another scene where there would be a tally of how many dead strippers and werewolves there were. Yes, it’s cheesy bad.

The movie had mediocre acting and bad makeup effects. And with a movie named Strippers vs. Werewolves, I expect to see lots of tits and ass.

Blu-ray Extras included commentary with producer Jonathan Sothcott and actor Simon Phillips. I guess the director was too ashamed of this movie to commentate. We also get a short documentary and a trailer.

Overall Grade: D


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